Good morning everyone and welcome.
My name is Tegan Rhodes, I am 18 years old and this is my story.
I have a 16 month old baby boy named Kayden. But many know him as his nickname “Choppy”.
I had Kayden at the age of just 16, and he is the rainbow after my storm.
I had a tough upbringing as a kid. And most of my traumas have matured and created me into the person and mother I am today.
My mother wasn’t around while I was growing up. Because she was caught up on the wrong side of life. And I struggled with that a lot.
I came to be in my paternal grandmother’s care at the age of 3. With my two older cousins, and my beautiful younger brother Brayden.
Nan always tried her very best to shield us away from generational trauma, but it just became a norm in our household.
Growing up I never really took notice of how it affected myself and the loved ones around me. Until it was too late.
This next part may be hard for some to hear.
On the 8th of September 2015, my uncle returned home and was in an ice induced psychosis. And brutally murdered my Nan and my baby brother, aged 8, in front of myself and my two older cousins, Hayley and Ireland.
It was extremely hard to learn that what we went through growing up wasn't so normal at all.
It became a long battle with mental health from there.
But us girls fight everyday to make a change in the community, and spread the word of domestic violence, the severe repercussions of drug and alcohol abuse.
And most importantly help educate people on how to break the cycle – for the new generation and the generations to come.
The thing that brought me to Flourish, was my strong determination to find a safe and stable safe for me and my son so that we can learn, grow and break that cycle.
Flourish has taught me many things in the short period I have been a part of their program.
They have taught me that it’s okay to ask for help, that it’s okay to feel the emotions we have whilst raising children and that it’s okay to speak up and learn strategies so that we can change that for our baby’s future.
I will say the groups run here are absolutely amazing. My favourite is Women’s Choice and Change. Being able to openly talk about DV in a relationship which myself and Kayden were unfortunately exposed to by my ex-partner. It really helped me understand what DV looks like in an intimate relationship.
As I only went through family DV.
I want people to understand that there are two completely different circumstances.
I thought I knew what DV looks like, but I was wrong.
Flourish taught me how to get out of that situation and become independent, than feeling like I needed to go back because I wanted my son to have that perfect family with a mother and father figure in the picture as I never had that growing up.
I now have grown and will Flourish from toxic mindset.
Flourish has helped me grow from generational trauma and taught me so many beneficial parenting skills for the future.
The workers here have also inspired me to one day become a peer worker to work with families, women, men and children
That have experienced what DV is.
To help mother’s that struggle to walk away from abusive partners – like myself, as that is all we have ever known.
So I would like to say a huge thank you to all the workers and the people who have made this place a place for mothers to have a second chance. And allowing us to become the mothers we wish we had.
And to finish off this speech, I would love to say that my mother would have greatly benefitted from a program like Flourish when she was a young Mum, so she could have broken the cycle for us.
It would’ve been a beautiful safe space for my baby brother Brayden, to enjoy this lovely sensory garden we have here today like his little nephew Choppy does.
Thank you for listening.
Flourish Australia
For more information, contact us on 1300 779 270 or make an enquiry now.